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“I told you earlier that I will be following up on this account. Now, you had screwed up everything,” my boss shouted, at the top of his lungs. It was not me that he was shouting at, fortunately. “But, Mr Know-It-All, you took such a long time to close the deal. Instead of being appreciative, you choose to pick up all the tiny details,” she refuted. No one in the entire organization dare to talk back to Mr PYK in that way except of course, Mrs PYK. “I am going shopping now, using YOUR credit card to de-stress myself. You can do whatever you like and I don’t care. And, by the way, you can pick up YOUR daughter on your way home,” Mrs PYK said without mincing her words as she stormed out of her husband’s room.

To the dozen staff outside his room, this was not an uncommon scene. It happened almost every other week. I was flabbergasted the first time but after a while, it was business as usual.

That was my first job office experience after college and to my benefit or detriment (I am really not sure), I told myself NEVER to work together with my husband, not in the same business, not in the same office. So, when my husband decided to set up his own business, it was without a slightest apprehension when I told him to get someone else to assist him even though I may be an enormous help. Was I right or was I purely daunted by my earlier unpleasant experience?

Let’s look at the pros and cons of husband and wife working together in the same office.

The Pros

• It’s like a dream come true. I am able to see my spouse almost every hour of the day (for those that are madly in love, it’s a huge plus).

• We can save so much on petrol and toll expenses and instead of two cars, we only need to maintain one.

• As we share the same colleagues, going outing together with spouse and colleagues at the same time is possible and fun.

• The happenings in the office become our conversation topics during dinner time. It is no more one-way traffic kind of communication whereby you do the sharing and I do the listening. I am able to contribute much because I was there and we can share office jokes together.

• If in a business together, it also means no more fickle-minded bosses and no more office politics. Since my spouse is in the same business, we share the same vision together and thus, enjoy total support. No need to go into lengthy explanations on why I need to go for that travel or dinner appointment. It’s all for the sake of the business and my spouse understands that completely.

• I need a business partner that I can completely trust and no one fits the bill better than my spouse. We already have some communication process in place and our skills and knowledge complements each other. That’s the best recipe to make the business run successfully. In fact, most successful family businesses started and built on this basis.

The Cons

• There is too much of “togetherness”. I like some space for my own, please!

• If both are working on the same project, it’s difficult to take leave and go for holiday at the same time.

• When it doesn’t work out for the business, it can take a heavy toll on the marital relationship.

• Wearing different hats for different occasion is difficult. When do I start playing the role of a business partner and when do I stop being one and start wearing “the spouse” hat? Most of the time, I get so consumed with the business issues that there is no escape. I can’t seem to find a relief valve!

So, should husband and wife work together?

Most organizations have a policy that banned married couples working together. In many occasions, once a dating couple of the same office got hitched, one of them will have to resign. It may not be a completely good policy because employers may run the risks of losing a good talented employee. So, how can an employer get round this issue? One solution is to allow married couples to work together in the same organization but ban them from working within the same department or departments that are closely related. Depending on the nature of company’s business and structure of the organization, this may work well for some companies.

As for going into business together, I have to agree with Ruth Hayden, family business counselor and author of For Richer, Not Poorer: The Money Book for Couples, “When it’s good, it’s very, very good, and when it’s bad, it’s horrific.”

As for me, my preference is obvious. I don’t need to be with my spouse 24 hours a-day. I would rather look forward to seeing him at the end of the day. In fact, one of my best moments of the day is to fall into his arms and said, “I am soo…tired, may I get a free massage, honey?” (yes, it’s supposed to sound mushy) and gladly putting the issues of the day behind me.

Well, what about you?